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Learning To Leverage Time

Uncategorized Oct 13, 2022

A lot can change in 5 years.

In April 2017, when this photo was taken, my wife and I had been together for a few short months.

We were just getting to know each other.
Had zero conflict in the relationship.
And I was pretty sure I was going to marry her.

But all good things take time…

It was another 2.5 years of dating and engagement before we finally tied the knot on September 8, 2019.

Shaloma and I have moved multiple times, I’ve changed careers, we’ve endured health challenges, deaths in our families, and yes several conflicts as well.

I wouldn’t trade a minute of it for the world.

It was Bill Gates who said that people overestimate what they can do in a year and underestimate what they can do in 5 years.

That quote feels very real as my wife and I recently celebrated our 3rd wedding anniversary.

When our relationship hit hard times - sickness especially - my initial response was to figure out how to fix the situation asap.

When Shaloma and I had some of our first disagreements - we wanted to fix them as quickly as we could.

When we sat down and set some goals for our marriage and relationship - I wanted them to happen right away.

But all good things take time…

When we see men embark on the recovery journey, this same dynamic often plays out…

For some reason they expect a 20+ year addiction to vanish in a matter of weeks or months!

But the people who are willing to grind it out, stay faithful to the boring things that seemingly have no impact…

Those are the ones who are soaring with freedom 5 years down the road.

For me, I am fast-approaching SEVEN years without porn. And I am in awe at how much God has done in such a short time…

-Happily married for 3 years
-Helped 100s of men overcome pornography (including professional athletes, CEOs, doctors, pastors, accountants, software engineers, college students, physiotherapists, etc.)
-15k+ downloads/month on our podcast Unleash The Man Within
-Author of a best-selling book, The Last Relapse (click here to get a free copy)
-The list goes on…

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28, NKJV)

If you’re not fully recovered yet, keep going. All good things take time

And if you want some help, we always carve out a few hours each week to speak to readers of this newsletter – click here to book a time.


Cheering you on,

PS. If you want to be married one day, I just put together a one-page resource with some tips for how to go about dating/picking a partner in a healthy way. Reply to this email with the word “MARRIAGE” and I’ll send it over.

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