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How To Handle Mountaintop Moments

Uncategorized Jan 20, 2022

I don’t always pose like Usain Bolt, but when I do, I make sure it’s on the highest mountain peak in Jamaica (about 7000ft above sea level).

It took us two tries to get to the peak of this mountain. The first try was thwarted by a landslide about 250 meters from the top! Only in Jamaica…

How often do we have mountain top moments in life? Promotions, achievements, hitting goals, freedom streaks, getting married, having kids, milestones, anniversaries, birthdays, accomplishing dreams, the list goes on.

Have you ever noticed how quickly a mountain top moment disappears? We trekked for hours to get to the top of this mountain in Jamaica, and a few short hours later we were back in the comfort of our home.

I lived a majority of the first 25 years of my life swinging from mountaintop to mountaintop. Searching for the achievement that would finally fulfill me. The accomplishment that would gain the recognition, notoriety, and approval that would make me feel validated,...

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CLINICAL BREAKDOWN: Why Novelty Enhances Pleasure

Uncategorized Jan 20, 2022

A fascinating discovery about porn addiction, and addiction at large, has surfaced in the last few years. It has revealed that gamblers are not addicted to winning, alcoholics are not addicted to alcohol, drug abusers are not addicted to substances, and porn addicts are not addicted to porn.

As scientists have begun to better understand the brain and what really makes us tick, it has become abundantly clear that while some addicts choose behaviors and others choose substances, their brains are really choosing the same thing: novelty. Research has shown that what forms an addiction is not obsession over the substance or behavior, but rather what is next. Really think about that one.

When a porn addict is consuming content, it is the anticipation of the next scene that drives their viewing. This is why even addicts set out to engage in a "little bit" of their respective drug, only to find themselves binging not too long after. The anticipation of what's next sucks them in.

This same...

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Knowing Your Name

Uncategorized Jan 13, 2022

Picture this. I am fresh out of university. I have long, shaggy hair (back in those days I would cut my hair roughly twice a year). I’m starting to lead worship at my church more often and a kid’s camp has asked me to help them out for a week.

The kids love “Uncle Sathiya” (every leader was called ‘uncle’ or ‘aunt’ before their name). But there’s a problem…

They can’t pronounce his name.

Say-thee-uh. Suh-thai-uh. Samantha (one kid actually called me that). I was hearing every ugly mispronunciation in the book. Rather than teaching these innocent kids to pronounce my complicated, Indo-Canadian name, I decided to go by a moniker. A bold one.

The rest of that week, the kids called me “Uncle Brown Sugar.” We joked that it was because I had great brown eyes. I often joke now that my nickname is the reason I love sweets so much, including this absolutely decadently delicious, to-die-for chocolate peanut butter...

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CLINICAL BREAKDOWN: Attachment Theory

Uncategorized Jan 13, 2022

In my own research and studying, I am becoming more and more convinced that the two most important therapeutic practices and techniques that have been developed are attachment theory and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). In a later post, we'll talk about ACT, but here is what you must know about attachment theory if you're looking to fully recover from porn addiction.

Attachment theory was formed by a British psychologist named John Bowlby in the early 1900s. He observed that how children bond with their caregivers has a major impact on their quality of life and relationships, and began to wonder why. The basic premise of his discovery is that the bond we form with our primary caregiver (typically our mothers) is monumental in providing the security necessary for children to develop healthily. Mary Ainsworth then tested this with children 12-18 months by observing their responses in the absence of their caregivers. Her discoveries and the theory at large have major...

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Don't Make This Mistake In 2022

Uncategorized Jan 06, 2022

Apparently, I missed the memo to look like a normal human being in this photo .

This picture was taken at a recent mastermind I attended. You are looking at some of the world’s leading young entrepreneurs that have created courses, apps, agencies and networks that are changing the world.

We heard from some unbelievable speakers – guys who have scaled and sold 9-figure businesses, bootstrapped 8-figure companies, and even an olympic athlete. It was pretty incredible. But to be honest, as deeply impactful as these sessions were, they paled in comparison to the true benefit of any quality mastermind...

The community.

One thing I have had to work through in my life is aloneness (not loneliness). Loneliness is when you are isolated, disconnected and no one is around. Aloneness is when people are around you and still feel like you don’t belong.

It’s hard to explain where it came from – being the token brown kid in predominantly white communities (like a...

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FAQ: Should I Delete Social Media During Recovery?

Uncategorized Jan 06, 2022

A lot of guys in the DeepClean community get freaked out when they hear my stance on social media. Most of them are also FULLY aware of how damaging their consumptions of social media can be on their overall health and recovery. So is there any way to keep social media while going through the recovery process?

The short answer is yes. In fact, during my own recovery from porn addiction, which took about 5 years altogether, I only deleted social media for small periods of time like during lent. My general MO, still to this day, is to leave social media off the phone by default. Download the app when you need to post or message and then delete it immediately after.

Interestingly enough, during my recovery a majority of my viewership took place on on my laptop – it was rarely on my phone. The correlation to me is obvious. I installed an extension on my browser that limited my social media consumption to as little as 10 minutes per day and this helped A TON. But I'll be frank,...

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One Thing Your New Years Resolution Must Include

Uncategorized Dec 30, 2021

Well, here we are. It is the end of 2021 – arguably one of the strangest years in recent history given the political, social and medical climates. As we put this unusual year behind us and look ahead, I can truthfully say with all my heart – I have NEVER been more excited!

I truly believe that the best is just around the corner for society at large. I know that there are many fear-based messages of doom and gloom. The woes of recovering from the pandemic, the seemingly endless control that governments are exercising, and the increased sexualization of our culture. I’m not denying these elements and I understand people’s cause for concern.

But you know what gets me excited? God has a plan.

Historically, God has come through every single time. He is yet to experience panic over humanity’s short-comings, and I don’t see why He would start now. Our work is cut out, but I really do believe 2022 is going to be a fantastic year.

As we get ready for...

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TESTIMONIAL: Jason Gingerich

Uncategorized Dec 30, 2021

Jason Gingerich is an ordinary man with an extraordinary story. Born and raised in Canada, married for 13 years and the father of 4 beautiful boys, he came to DeepClean looking to tackle porn once and for all. Little did he know resolving the root issues of pornography was just the start.

The DeepClean approach is about inside-out transformation. As the internal changes take place, it is only a matter of time before the external catches up. During Jay's first year in DeepClean, he has quit his job so he could start his own business AND boldly decided to move his family to a new country.

What has changed so dramatically in Jason's life that he is making these kinds of radical moves? One simple word: Confidence. Discovering himself, doing the deep inner work, and reaching a new place of health has provided the kind of self-assurance needed to make these life-altering decisions.

While his progress has been rather remarkable, these stories are the norm for those who are willing to...

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5 Keys To Enjoy The Holidays Porn-Free

Uncategorized Dec 23, 2021

We are at that critical point in the year – 2021 is wrapping up and we are bracing ourselves for a clean slate in 2022. In many ways, the next 7 days are the launchpad that determines how well you finish 2021 and how well you begin 2022. Today's blog looks at 5 things you MUST do if you want to stay porn-free during the holidays.

1) Be Careful With Technology – As soon as we get out of our regular rhythms and routines, we beeline for our phones and laptops! It's crazy how the brain works. Go into the holidays with some clear boundaries on how you will use technology, especially personal devices. Tell someone about it and make sure you're held accountable.

2) Mentally Prepare For Family Gatherings – I know, I know, mental preparation is reserved for professional athletes and performers right? Well, not quite. The better prepared you are to encounter your family (and possibly friends), the better the experience. If you have a relatively functional family that gets...

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Stay Clean During The Holidays

Uncategorized Dec 23, 2021

It is indeed the most wonderful time of the year! I’m not sure about you, but I love Christmas. To be clear – I’m not the guy who decorates his house Dec 1 and starts blasting Christmas music, but when I say I love Christmas – I mean I love the week or so that revolves around Dec 25.

Christmas is a time to relax, spend time with family, eat copious amounts of food, and remember the incredible gift of salvation that was freely given to us in that lowly manger in Bethlehem. According to one of the world’s largest porn websites, New Years Eve, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and New Years Day are the 4 least popular days for watching porn (in the listed order). 

This tells us that the natural elements of this season – family, food, fun, free time – can be incredibly rewarding and enriching to the human soul. We ought to pay careful attention to what transpires during these holidays so that we understand what causes...

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