My parents decided to get married in 1983 after knowing each other for a grand total of 15 minutes!
My Dad lived in Canada at the time, my Mom was living in India.
So what do you talk about when you only have 15 minutes to decide if the person in front of you will become your life partner?
The weather, obviously.
My Dad’s main questions to my Mom were:
-Can you cook? (As my Mom likes to say… she lied and said “yes”)
-Can you handle living in cold Canada? (As my Mom likes to say…she lied and said “yes”)
Ten days later they were married.
Three kids, one retirement, several moves, and many memories later, my parents just celebrated a whopping 39 years together!
Not only have they set a quality example for me and my siblings to follow in our own marriages, they help other couples strengthen their marriages through their coaching practice (and newly released book called The Unbreakable Marriage).
While we were celebrating their anniversary, we asked them for some words of wisdom now that we are all married and wanting to have successful marriages like theirs.
I also had a chance to interview them on Unleash The Man Within recently where we went into great detail about arranged marriages, lasting love, and practical ways to grow as a couple.
Here are some of the main takeaways:
1) Go Into Marriage With Divorce Off The Table - My mom went into marriage with the mindset that divorce is not an option. Yes, there’s an Indian value system underlying that notion, but the mentality is still relevant for creating a healthy, committed relationship.
2) Know Your Partner’s Love Language(s) - The better you understand how your partner will feel loved by you, the stronger your connection will be. Sometimes it requires sacrifice and going beyond your comfort zone, but it’s worth it.
3) You Can Fall Out of Love - While North American culture has created several industries around the idea of “falling in love”, if you can fall in love with someone you can fall out of love with them too. Love is a choice more than anything else, and it’s a choice that you make day-in and day-out with your spouse.
Marriage is hard work, but incredibly rewarding too.
If you’re married - I pray your marriage continues to thrive.
If you want to be married one day, I just put together a one-page resource with some tips for how to go about dating/picking a partner in a healthy way. Reply to this email with the word “MARRIAGE” and I’ll send it over.
Cheering you on,
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